![[BANG BANG] Coming Around To Adult Toys. Kind Of.](http://www.cultistzine.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/187404-187518-350x350-290x290.png "[BANG BANG] Coming Around To Adult Toys. Kind Of.")
[BANG BANG] Coming Around To Adult Toys. Kind Of.
Dear family members who might be reading this, this is an article about sex toys. In a few years I might be more like a Nora Ephron, and you can feel proud and brag to your board of executive friends about me or whatever (probably not), but right now I’m more of a Lena Dunham,...
![[TRUE STORY] I Had An Inappropriate Office Friendship](http://www.cultistzine.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/office-affair-001-290x276.jpg "[TRUE STORY] I Had An Inappropriate Office Friendship")
[TRUE STORY] I Had An Inappropriate Office Friendship
*events, names, and places have been changed, and this article is loosely, but not entirely, based on the truth. And mildly exaggerated at points. This is a scintillating tale about the time I accidentally almost had an office relationship. To give myself a splinter of credit, I wouldn’t actually call it a relationship, because nothing...
![[COSMO SUCKS] 75 Sex Tips To Ignore](http://www.cultistzine.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/m221178648-290x290.jpg "[COSMO SUCKS] 75 Sex Tips To Ignore")
[COSMO SUCKS] 75 Sex Tips To Ignore
As a sex writer in a monogamous relationship who wears 123,600 times more dog-hair-covered leggings and mismatched socks than she does lace lingerie, silk blindfolds, and Lucite heels with hot pink feathers on them, it’s important that I stay abreast of the latest fornication trends. How do I do this? Not by having actual sex,...
![[PEN PAL] Dear Dr. Ruth](http://www.cultistzine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/original-290x290.jpg "[PEN PAL] Dear Dr. Ruth")
[PEN PAL] Dear Dr. Ruth
Dear Dr. Ruth, I want what you have. I want to get paid for talking incessantly about sex. I thought I was on the right track. I thought I was making progress with all of the candid doggy style banter and 14-years of therapy and making people squirm and avert their eyes in discomfort as I...
I Might Be Controlling And Awful
“Is it still considered being controlling if you just know that you know better than he does?” The above is an inquiry to my therapist (we’re going on fourteen glorious years now) during our last emergency session. Much to my smug satisfaction she replied, “I hate the word controlling, it’s so vague. Of course you’re...
![[TRUE STORY] I'm Having a Real-ationship](http://www.cultistzine.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/Jane-290x290.png "[TRUE STORY] I'm Having a Real-ationship")
[TRUE STORY] I’m Having a Real-ationship
Hi, I’m Jane, and I am an over-sharer. I didn’t always used to be this way, but ever since I turned twenty-five I’ve been a bit loose-lipped (pun intended). There is little that I won’t share with a semi-willing audience, and when you first meet me, there is a good chance that you’ll either go...
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