Generally I dispense unsolicited love and relationship advice, but not this time! Today my assistance has been specifically requested. Kind of. As you learned a few weeks ago, our very own Yasi has been helping the fine readers of Askmen.com to navigate the complicated realm of the lady brain. It’s been said this is harder than locating the clit. Being the generous (and extremely busy) love guru that she is, she threw me a bone I MEAN asked me for my opinion on this small matter of howone knows if he is in love. This is what I said.
Love has no defining moment or distinguishing precursor. (Right now you’re just blown away by how helpful I am. You’re so welcome!) For me, love is having the compulsion to utter those three filthy words, and then actually following through with it (just quietly enough so that I am forced to replay your message 7 times and make my sister listen to it in order to tell if you are actually saying I LOVE YOU for the first time over my voicemail).
If you’re feeling like you want to say “I love you” to someone, then you probably do love them, at least in all the capacity for love that you have at that particular moment in time. My understanding of love is always morphing. The way I love my boyfriend now is entirely different than the way I felt when we were “falling in love” a few years back. The love I have now wouldn’t recognize the love I had then, and if they ever met one another they’d probably get in a fist fight and call each other a pussy bitch (luckily they won’t because time travel doesn’t exist…yet).
I am always finding new ways to be closer and more intimate with my partner (because I’m cheesy), even when I think that there are no more and no newer ways. I wish that there was a different phrase, other than “I love you,” to more adequately capture the way my love has, and continues to, evolve. Maybe I need to learn a few more languages. Or maybe I should just make some up. Maybe that’s what “Babe, can I have you in the butt tonight?” means. I don’t know, I don’t speak men (but i shouldn’t tell you that, since you’re soliciting me for advice).
Anyway, my point is that, there is no proven physical symptom of love (or maybe there is. I think I heard a study about love emitting endorphins which make you happy). But, if you’re feeling like you want to sacrifice your own convenience to take the person that you suspect you might love to pick up their car that’s being serviced an hour a way during rush hour traffic, and if you want to spent the last $100 that your grandpa gave you for graduation money on taking the someone that you just possibly might love out to a fancy seafood dinner, then you’re probably in love.
I hope this helps! Love is fun (most of the time), don’t be fooled or deterred by the fact that maybe you feel right now like you want to throw up.